Even if you adore the holidays, if you’re halfway human there will be triggers and stressors that come up for you during this season of family gatherings. Relationship dynamics can be hard. One of the hardest things we have to deal with in life – how to act, what to say, what not to say and how to keep everybody on speaking terms can be, well, challenging, whether or not it’s Christmas!
The people who ‘get it’ – who know how to get along with everybody in the room don’t just do it by chance. They understand what’s making the other person tick, they’re good at reading the subtle signs and the body language, and they’re also very good at controlling their own reactions when triggered. But more important than all of this: they have a strategy.
Just like going into battle, it pays to enter the Christmas season with a game plan.
This may sound harsh, but trust me – to avoid the fallout when this many people come together, you need tactics.
Your Christmas Secret Weapon: the Life Path Number
The most vital piece of intel you need before entering the Christmas season is a list of birthdays.
Ask your mum. She’ll think you’re just getting ready for plotting out next years calendar.
Why their birthdays? Well, the precise date of someone’s birth contains coded information about who they are. It reveals the shape of their life’s journey, including the kinds of personal challenges they face and the opportunities they have, as well as many of the innate traits and talents that they were born with.
Numerologists call this number – which comes directly from the birth date – the Life Path Number, and knowing it can be like a magic key – it’s a way to unlock someone’s potential in life AND around the dinner table at Chrismas!
It’s incredibly simple to calculate somebody’s Life Path Number. All you need is to add together each digit of their date of birth, then reduce the sum until you reach a single digit or Master Number. Click here for more info, or use the free calculator below –
Get Your Mini-Reading Below
ODE TO JOY – OR, ODE TO ACCEPTANCE – BY LIFE PATH NUMBER
Once you’re armed with the Life Path Number for the person you need to spend time with, scroll down for the reading on how best to interact with them during the Chrismas season (of course, this if a full-proof method, whatever the time of year!)
You can also scroll down to your own Life Path reading, to see how the holiday season affects you and how you can ask others to treat you.
When you’re spending with a Life Path 1 at Christmas:
They need to take the lead. And if they want to lead, they must have followers. They’re here to cultivate their individuality, independence, and they seek nothing more than to be #1.
A key to getting along: Know that they need to be in charge. Let them. Know that they need cheerleaders. Cheerlead.
Some possible issues: Is this person a leader or have they folded in their life? Are they active and engaged in creative and/or business pursuits or are they taking a secondary role? If they’re not actively expressing healthy independence and achievement, they’ll struggle with negativity, cynicism, and scathing judgment.
If you want to understand them: Allow them to be the center of attention when it feels appropriate. Encourage them to act upon creative ideas if that’s something they’re not actively pursuing. They’re meant to follow their unique voice. Appreciate and respect where they have come from, which is usually “The School of Hard Knocks.”
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to be in charge. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as negative or narcissistic, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 2 (or 11) at Christmas:
They’re conflict avoidant. They’re mediators and just want to give and receive unconditional love – and they’re extraordinarily emotionally sensitive.
A key to getting along: Know that they often live and breathe family and that they thrive when the whole group is thriving. Understand that they’re intuitive and very emotionally sensitive. These folks need acknowledgment and affirmation.
Some possible issues: If they’re not being acknowledged for what they do, they can emotionally withdraw and be resentful. If they’re hurt, they can become childish, combative, and downright impossible. They can over-give and then wonder when it’s their turn.
If you want to understand them: Allow them to “mother” you. Encourage them to talk and be involved with group activities that give a sense of purpose. Celebrate the way in which they take care of the details and want everyone to be happy. Give them extra kudos for everything they do.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by giving them approval for the things they do. Did they bring the green-bean casserole? Make a special point to compliment them. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as self-absorbed and childish, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 3 at Christmas:
They’re creative powerhouses. They’ve got a great intellect and thrive on good communication. They’re deeply emotional and are ultimately joyful and giving people. They’re natural entertainers, performers, and can be the Christmas Host or Hostess with the Mostess.
A key to getting along: Know that they need to have their creative outlets – through writing, teaching, performing, music – just as a few examples. Know that they’re extremely emotionally sensitive and need to be “heard” from the inside out – they usually like to dig deep into the emotional components of relationships.
Some possible issues: If they’re not using their creativity and expressing emotions consistently, they can experience depression. They can be scattered and have trouble following through with things. Also know that they are debilitated by criticism. If they’re out of balance, they’ll be unable to connect to you on an emotional level and will usually default to being critical, moody, self-absorbed and/or emotionally unavailable.
If you want to understand them: Listen to them and they’ll most often listen to you. They love great conversation, love to know who you really are, and love to support you in whatever you do. Encourage their creativity and ask them what they honestly think about things – they can have a debilitating sense of self-doubt. They need to feel safe and heard before they can expose their true feelings.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them their emotional self-indulgence. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as depressive or full of self-doubt, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 4 (or 22) at Christmas:
They’re most often the pillar of the family. They’re solid, steady, and crave security and are hard workers. They can be (or want to be) a dominant presence in the family and are often the upholders of tradition.
A key to getting along: Understand that they’re the “slow and steady” person. Allow them to process slowly and take the steps it takes to get there. Ask them about the newest book they’re reading – they love sharing their knowledge.
Some possible issues: They can be workaholics. They can sometimes be stubborn, blunt, and opinionated – and can be a bulldozer when it comes to doing what they feel needs to be done. If they’re out of balance, they can be myopic and bossy have an inability to understand anyone’s point of view other than their own.
If you want to understand them: Allow them to give you unsolicited advice – also understand that they see the world in a very “literal” way. Appreciate the ways they’re reliable and knowledgeable.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to step on their soapbox but don’t let it become an argument. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as inflexible and argumentative, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 5 at Christmas:
They can be the life of the party. They’re freedom loving, adventurous, and an agent of change. They often live life “without a filter.” They’re always up for fun and something funny.
A key to getting along: Know that they need their space. “Don’t fence me in!” is their mantra. Appreciate their quirky humor. Enjoy their unpredictability. Understand that they’re super-emotional. If it’s appropriate, humor their propensity to be a Drama Queen or King.
Some possible issues: If they’re feeling hemmed in or lacking direction, they can be quite volatile. During the holidays where excess is already part of the mix, addictions can be an issue – they can struggle with excess and with a tendency to escape through substance use. They can lack focus, commitment, and follow-through. Often the 5 Life Path can grapple with fear and retraction from social life.
A key to getting along: Allow them to have their space. Appreciate the ways in which they’re so fun and full of life. Know that they might let a few things fall through the cracks during the holidays – don’t take it personally.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to take center stage or alternatively, to not engage in everything that you think that they should. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as volatile and excessive, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy.
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 6 (or 33) at Christmas:
They’re the “love and marriage, horse and carriage” kind-of person, usually. They’re all about home and family in some way – even if that family is non-traditional or workplace-related. They’re super-responsible and can be quite visionary.
A key to getting along: Know that family, friends, children (and often pets) are close to their hearts. They are often Super Mom or Super Dad – and that can have both its upside and its downside, depending on how balanced it is. Understand that they are control freaks – they don’t like to be told what to do
If you want to understand them: They’re perfectionists. If not balanced, they can be extremely hard on themselves and on their family members. If they’re not happy, ain’t nobody happy! They often feel as though they’re in their game when “putting out fires” and they often feel as though they place themselves on hold in order to take care of everyone else. So the more you can understand that about them, the more you might encourage them to delegate responsibilities, or at least understand the basic source of their anxiety.
A key to getting along: Allow them to organize things and yet remember to acknowledge the way in which they offer a nurturing environment. Appreciate the ways in which they attempt to take care of the nuances and details. When you see that anything having to do with family has some additional zing to it for a 6 Life Path, the better off you’ll be.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to be the center within the family dynamic when possible. They can become somewhat self-righteous because ultimately they’re idealists and can be disappointed when things turn out less than perfect. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as overly controlling and meddling, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 7 at Christmas:
They’re elusive truth seekers – highly analytical and data-driven and yet also acutely intuitive. These folks are usually on a different wavelength than most which can make them seem difficult people, appearing somewhat detached at times.
A key to getting along: Understand that they’re on a spiritual path and are truth seekers. These folks are heady and contemplative. Also understand that they need some detached “alone” time, especially during the frenetic holiday season.
Some possible issues: If they’re off balance, they can be amazingly superficial – and they can be super-rude, with the sharpest tongue you’ve ever experienced, so be prepared. Often these folks need to retract a bit and can have sensory-overload fairly easily. Even though they might “read” as detached or not paying attention, they are actually processing every single nuance.
If you want to understand them: Allow them be a little “woo-woo” or weird – or better yet, encourage them to open that part of themselves to you by being positive about what they share. They can over-analyze virtually everything. They are often quite caring and compassionate and want the best for you, even if you have to wade through their trust issues to get there.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to be in their own little world most of the time. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as superficial and caustic, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 8 at Christmas:
They think in business-like terms – time is money after all, even over the holiday season! They’re often successful in the material and financial. They’re the pillar of the community and really care about their (and your!) appearance – both literally and figuratively. They’re here to make a mark in the world.
A key to getting along: Understand that they’re meant to be mastering the art of money, power, control, and authority. That’s a large order to fill! Know that they often avoid emotions and communicate more comfortably in business-like terms – although they are highly emotional, it is not the way in which they prefer to present themselves. Praise them for their achievements. Allow them to help you out if they offer it.
Some possible issues: They are often blunt and opinionated. Their way is often “the only way”. The 8 Life Path is learning all about the material world and therefore often struggles with money. If they’re off balance, they struggle with scarcity or downright poverty and can be the ultimate victim – where they feel that it’s everyone and everything else’s fault if they haven’t found achievement in their lives.
If you want to understand them: Allow them to focus on money and gifts during the holidays, as long as it’s balanced with giving. Encourage them to go have some fun and relax. They often express quite driven behavior, staying very focused on manifesting something – whether it is with their career or personal life.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to be large and in charge. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as either victims of circumstance and as overly money-focused, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
When you’re spending time with a Life Path 9 at Christmas:
They’re the ultimate humanitarians. They’re charismatic and have a giving and compassionate heart. Family is very important to them and they are givers.
A key to getting along: These folks are there to help, support and improve life for you. Understand that they’re usually going to help others no matter what. The holidays bring out both joy and reflection for these folks who are working on developing a healthy balance between giving and receiving – both emotionally and in other aspects of life.
Some possible issues: They’ll never, ever ask for help, so offer support even when they act like they don’t need it. They’re often dealing with feeling like they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. They can get overwhelmed and bitter about trouble in the world. They can become resentful and have problems letting go of the past. Alternately, they can present as rather myopic and self-absorbed if they struggle with their Life Path purpose.
If you want to understand them: Allow them to give. They’re extremely creative and want to give of themselves in every way that they can, especially during the holiday season. Appreciate the ways in which they see you and support you for exactly who you are.
If this person triggers you: Detach yourself by allowing them to give abundantly during the season. If they’re challenged with their Life Path purpose and instead display as self-centered and embittered by their past, remind yourself that at the end of the day, they’re doing their best – even if it drives you crazy!
Understanding Your Own Life Path Number
When you know your own Life Path number, it allows you to reflect upon the ways in which you’re matched (or not!) with those in your world.
This is SUCH a useful tool for “getting” each other, which goes way beyond the usual surface small talk which abounds over the Christmas season. It won’t “fix” any issues you might have, or magically make the annoyances what crop up when in each others company disappear. Yet knowing more about what makes the people in your life tick can provide a different lens from which to view your similarities and your differences.
It’s SO simple – so why not use Numerology as a shift your perspective this Christmas, and create a holiday season that allows you to feel more empowered and less likely to camp out on the therapist’s couch!
